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Preface:In December,Dad was admitted to the hospital with Chronic Atrial Fibrillation and pacemaker generator failure.It was decided that the generator needed to be replaced as soon as possible(he had been putting it off for over a year!),which was done in January.The following is the story of our follow-up visit…..
The night before….
Me:”Don’t forget.Your doctor’s appointment is at 2.I’ll pick you up at 1.”
Dad:”In the morning?”
Me:”No!In the afternoon.What doctor sees patients at 2AM?”
Dad:”Just making sure.”
The day of,while driving there…..
Dad:”What the f*** is that guy doing?Damn drivers!”
WTF?Dad dropped the f-bomb?!I swear I could’ve driven off the road!
At the doctor’s office(who is on time,by the way!)….
and I’m still recovering from Dad’s f-bomb and the doctor being on time!
Dr.S:”Mr.F,you know that the old generator had been totally depleted for over a year?I set this to last 10 years.”
Dad:”Well,I probably won’t be here in 10 years.”
Dr.S:”There is absolutely nothing wrong with you,except for this cardiac arrhythmia.And this should take care of it.”
Dad:”We’ll see.”
Dr.S(to me):”You know you’re father talked alot under sedation.He’s been chased by alot of women since you’re mother died.”
Me:”I know.Did he tell you about the widow who’s husband left her the hotel on the beach in Barbardos?”
Dr.S:”You’re kidding…”
Dad:”She lived in a trailer.”
Me:”No,she didn’t.She had a condo in St.Pete.”
Dad:”She did?”
Dr.S:”She owned a hotel on the beach in Barbados and you didn’t go for that?”
Dad:”She lived in a trailer.”
Grrrrrrr……………
On leaving the exam room,Dad to Dr.S:”You don’t speak Swedish,do you?”
Me:”Dad,you don’t speak Swedish.”
Dad:”I know.I just wanted to know if he did.”
and people wonder why I drink……
But….
wait………
there’s more!
With life with Dad,there is always more……….
After receiving the ultrasound of Michael,the Elder,and Dawn’s baby,he called….
“You know,I’ve been looking at this,all day, with the magnifying glass,and I can’t make out if it’s a boy or girl.”
Me:”It’s too early.But all the parts are there.”
Dad:”Well,could they take a better picture next time?”
We’ll work on it Dad…………..
3 comments:
Too funny! I wish I was having those conversations with my dad. I just turned 26 when he died...I sure miss him. Your dad sounds like a hoot.
OMG - I think you and I have the same father! :-) I just went thru a very similar experience last week with my Dad - he was hospitalized w Atrial Fib (no pacer - yet) but the conversations were so similar! It's a challenge, but I'm glad I still have him - he will be 80 next week...
OMG, Chris! You had me laughing out loud! I haven't followed your blog in a while - great idea to put the link on FB!
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